The World According to Glissando

Author: Glenn Hansen

  • Love You to the Moon and Back

    A Real Life Story by Glenn Hansen

    Dedicated to Sweet Judith, wherever you are in God’s universe.

    CHAPTER 18

    On the Wednesday following that Monday, I received a phone call from the wife of one of Judy’s sons around nine o’clock in the morning. Judy had passed away last night. I immediately offered my condolences to her and the family and said if they needed my help in any way, please let me know. This is customary, but I really meant it.

    My emotions were plentiful and diverse. I was so sorry Judy passed away, but I was happy knowing the pain and suffering she endured was over. I believe she’s gone somewhere much better than this planet into God’s universe. It is my faithful belief and hope that I too, when I leave this planet, will likewise move into God’s universe. Maybe I will even see Judy again in some way. This all is an unknown that will never be resolved on this planet.   

    Nevertheless, even though this was expected, you’re never ready for it. The sense of loss, however it reveals itself to you, is staggering and overwhelming. I’m still working through it and I don’t really know how long it will take. I will ultimately move on, but I must be patient. To be sure though, I will never forget and will always feel Judy.

    I’ve been fortunate. I have never lost a sibling. I have lost both of my parents. I remember and love my mother, but it is my dad that I really miss to this day. He passed away quite some time ago, and while I have long gone on with life, he is never far away from my thoughts and being, and this is a good thing in so many ways.

    I remember I was pretty stoic at first when he passed away. I concentrated on the tasks at hand which is my nature. But a few weeks later, as I was driving somewhere, the loss hit me like a ton of bricks. I started to cry and cry, so much so that I pulled over and stopped. This was “the moment.” There was nowhere to run, nowhere to hide. The feelings had to come out. I learned this is necessary so that you can carry on in life. As time passes, you really will feel better again. Time heals. This was a seminal moment for me. While I don’t remember where I was going, I clearly remember where I pulled over. I also remember it was day time.

    I was grateful to have received the phone call about Judy’s passing so quickly because they wanted to let me know first so that I would not hear it second hand. Her family recognized we had a special relationship for which I am thankful. I always stood aside though when it came to her family and their wishes. I was not ever going to be a hindrance to them. They were family. I also naturally presumed they would now let others know with expedience.

  • Love You to the Moon and Back

    A Real Life Story by Glenn Hansen

    Dedicated to Sweet Judith, wherever you are in God’s universe.

    CHAPTER 17

    My visits with Judy continued. I was still happy and grateful to be able to see her on a regular basis. I knew time was running short as Judy’s accelerating decline was becoming even quicker. We did not converse much anymore. She was just too weak. We would sit outside in the court yard at Riverview and she would close her eyes and feel the breeze and life in nature.

    From time to time, she would open her eyes, look at me in that special way, and warmly smile. We still had this wonderful connection, and we would always have it. I would nod and smile back at her with all my heart.

    “Love you to the moon and back.” We shared this phrase with each other to the very end.

    It was a Monday afternoon when I next visited Judy. It was a wonderful day to be outdoors. We had yet another very nice time together. We sat outside that day for an hour and a half until she was almost out of oxygen. I took her back to the ward in her wheelchair and we went into the “Kitchen.” She liked to hang in there. It was a good break from the long hours she spent in her comfortable room.

    Her room was filled with family photos and mementoes, gifts, flowers, magazines and more. It was to give her a sense of “being at home.” This is yet another wonderful aspect of Riverview’s patient care, and her family had gladly and generously provided most of the items to create this “home.” It was lovely.

    In the “Kitchen,” one of the health aides expediently changed her oxygen tank. Once she was settled in there, she knew I would be leaving. We hugged each other tenderly. I kissed her on the forehead. She kissed me on the neck. I quietly told her, “Love you to the moon and back.” Judy gathered what little strength she still had and replied, “Love you to the moon and back.” I told her I would be back on Wednesday. I smiled warmly and tenderly at her and quietly left, again, as always, thanking the staff for the care they are giving Judy as I walked past the ward’s reception area on the way out.

    I had designed and had professionally printed a customized Thank You card which, along with some nice chocolates, I gave to the staff in the ward the previous week to show my appreciation for them and all that they were doing for my Sweet Judith. My heart and head had no problem agreeing on doing this.   

    As I drove back to my apartment, our close friendship rolled through my brain like an IMAX movie. While what was happening to Judy was, of course, very sombre and saddening for me, I recalled the numerous “good times” we shared in the midst of this difficult journey. I would not trade it for the world. I was a better person as a result, and know Judy is a true friend on a profound level that you rarely find in life. I also know how much she appreciates my genuine friendship and how much it means to her.

    As I pulled into the parking lot at home on that Monday, I also realized Judy’s heart is still filled with her loving, caring and giving nature in spite of everything. What I did not know at the time is today would be the last time I would ever see Judy.       

  • Love You to the Moon and Back

    A Real Life Story by Glenn Hansen

    Dedicated to Sweet Judith, wherever you are in God’s universe.

    CHAPTER 16

    Speaking of music, it was around this time that I decided to try and find out more about the man playing piano in the window. We were now almost always acknowledging each other when he was there playing. I know, kind of hard to do so when he’s not playing. lol

    At Riverview Healthcare Centre, there is a lovely, multi-denominational chapel at one end along with a patient hair salon and a beautiful solarium sitting room for patients and their visitors with massive coated windows so you could see and feel the sun directly without overheating. I came to realize that the other set of doors at that end accessed the ward where I saw my “Piano Man” (thank you, Billy Joel).

    One day I decided to go through these doors to the front desk of the ward to try and learn about him. This is when I became aware that these were restricted access doors, so I could not open them without being accompanied by a healthcare centre employee. Curious, I thought. I decided to not pursue this further at this time.

    A few days later, I again went to the ward with the restricted entrance. This time, I was able to meet up with an appropriate employee and asked her about why the doors to the piano man’s ward were locked. Like virtually every other employee I met at Riverview, she was very approachable, friendly, and helpful with a nice educational touch. She explained that the doors were secured for this ward because it housed patients with memory/cognitive issues (illnesses such as Alzheimer’s disease). She further explained exiting the ward was also secure out of concern for these patients wandering off unaccompanied.

    I had heard of this type of secured entrance/exit before from my music performing experiences at seniors’ care homes.  I occasionally went out and played and sang at these types of venues and I remember not being able to get out of the building after my first performance at one. One of the staff at the care home came and explained the secured door concept to me. There was an ever-changing code you had to enter in order to get out of the facility. Like at Riverview, it was to ensure residents with cognitive/memory issues could not wander off unaccompanied. It made perfect sense. Who knew?

    A sense of sadness struck me. There was a pretty good chance my piano man suffered from some sort of worsening cognitive/memory issue. I was very sad for him. He loved to play, but maybe he had very little remembrance of his joy after he finished playing. I was also saddened to think that even though our connections were genuine in the moment, he may not remember them as well.

    Life is arbitrary and unfair. This familiar phrase is so true. To be deprived of happiness and joy because your mind diminishes in this way is terrible. You get locked out from your own happy memories by your own brain. Add to this the declining cognitive function; it must be very frustrating to live with this affliction for both you and those around you. And to think you are aware of this happening until nearly the end must sometimes be exasperating.

    We can think we are invincible when we’re young, some of us for most of our life even, but there is no shortage of ways for life to take a person down at any age. Yet, some of humanity is still afflicted with destructive arrogance. Don’t people realize how small we really are in comparison to the universe? We should be humble, not arrogant. This whole “life” thing is almost beyond conceptualization and appreciation. Maybe that’s why some turn to arrogance and bullying; to try and have some sense of personal strength and control over the world. But, it’s delusionary and it’s wrong. We need to respect and care about each other. The kind of caring I witness every time I’m at Riverview Healthcare Centre.

    I was disappointed to realize the apparent plight of my piano man. Then I had a nice thought. Even if it was in the moment only, he still experienced some joy while playing and likewise whenever we connected through the window. It brought a smile to my face that maybe I was able to contribute to his life in a positive manner in some way. I was encouraged by this and determined to carry on with our relationship be it as it may.

  • Love You to the Moon and Back

    A Real Life Story by Glenn Hansen

    Dedicated to Sweet Judith, wherever you are in God’s universe.

    CHAPTER 15

    Judy and I did have an opportunity to play music together again one more time with Judy on the bodhran drum and me on guitar and singing. I arranged for us to do a “show” in the “Kitchen” in her ward at Riverview Healthcare Centre for the patients in the ward and a few others. It meant a lot to me and Judy to be able to do this again. And what a grand time it was.

    We played for a full hour to a very receptive audience who seemed to genuinely enjoy the performance. I learned later from staff that we could have played for another hour if we wanted to. Apparently, the patients on the ward loved to listen to live music.

    However, after an hour, Judy had run out of steam. Besides, I had run out of my beverage (sorry, non-alcohol lol) by then, which was necessary for vocal lubrication. My voice needs all the help it can get.

    Whenever I perform, I like to close with “Hey Jude” (a hugely famous Beatles’ song). It features a simple, easy to sing along with chorus at the end that can go on for as long as you would like. It’s the end sing-along aspect of this terrific tune that makes it an ideal closing song as people, whether or not they can sing well, can wail away at the top of their lungs. What a wonderful way to end a show, everybody happily singing along together.

    This show was no exception. Everyone in the “Kitchen” whole heartedly sang along. We all left feeling good, if only for a moment. It was another treasured time for me and Judy. I will always cherish the picture of the two of us playing taken by my friend Dawn, who was at the show along with Carol.

  • Love You to the Moon and Back

    A Real Life Story by Glenn Hansen

    Dedicated to Sweet Judith, wherever you are in God’s universe.

    CHAPTER 14

    The now consistent warmth of spring allowed for the opening of the exquisite outdoor court yard at Riverview. It was a delightful place for Judy and I to go and spend time on my visits. She loved being outdoors. The texture of nature is embedded in her soul.

    The court yard felt like a very nice, somewhat exclusive outdoor patio. It was big and provided an earthy, connected with nature feel, as it was encompassed by a variety of plants and trees. The round outdoor tables with bright sky blue and lively yellow centre umbrellas offered roomy seating for six. There were maybe eight of them. Other important amenities included a half oval raised area which had smaller tables and I have no doubt once summer was here, it would be utilized for live music and other types of events and activities. You could go for a short walk amongst the trees along a pathway adjacent to the court yard. If you had young kids, they could play in the playground area. There was no shortage of benches, chairs and rocking benches throughout the area. One of Judy’s favourite things was the little waterfall and pond that housed lovely looking Koi fish with their resplendent colours. Finally, there was a small, roofed, but open sided eating area with a very large Napoleon barbecue.  

    The court yard was a very special place at Riverview. I sometimes said to Judy when we were sitting at a patio table, to close her eyes and pretend we were at a high end, ocean side patio restaurant. What a wonderful moment of escapism for both of us together.

    With Judy’s health starting to decline at an accelerated rate, this was the place for us to go now. The pretty park in the front of the healthcare centre was out of reach now given her further weakened status. We would chat, but there was less chat now and more rest. We still would have the occasional “dinner date” inside without the show. It still brought us the enjoyment of chatting over dinner. It was fun, and more that ever I wanted Judy to enjoy her time as much as possible. Her happiness brought me great pleasure, happiness and gratefulness that I have had her in my life no matter how long it was going to be for.

    Judy enjoyed our short excursions along the court yard pathway and we did it many times.

    One of the architectural aspects I enjoyed was the natural stately cedar fencing which enclosed the courtyard and indeed many other outdoor areas around Riverview. This fencing added immensely to the overall natural outdoor feel that abounds throughout the healthcare centre’s grounds.

    It is no accident that this is how the whole complex is designed, this warm earthy feel. It’s to have a peaceful, healing and caring environment for the patients who find themselves here.    

  • Love You to the Moon and Back

    A Real Life Story by Glenn Hansen

    Dedicated to Sweet Judith, wherever you are in God’s universe.

    CHAPTER 13

    Now, you may be wondering why, really, I was doing this for someone who I had basically known for only a month before the first medical event that sent her to the hospital. While I don’t have to explain myself, I will try to.

    You see, I am trying to evolve as a person. I am seeking a better place for my life and I was getting there. I had worked to remove as much stress as possible as I found it to be pretty toxic and very damaging to me mentally, emotionally and physically. I’m sure there are many who can relate to this. Stress for me was particularly damaging.   

    For better or worse, I haven’t totally figured this one out yet, I try to be kind, helpful, have empathy and elevate others. I want people to cooperate with each other, which is why I struggle with some human behaviours. Can’t people see that by working together life for everyone will be better? Why does humanity keep being so self-destructive? It really does not accomplish anything. Avarice, the seeking of power, self-centredness, jealousy and so on; these are not good behaviours. We end up destroying each other because of our wanton wants.

    I am what I am and I genuinely want to keep progressing as a person, and peacefully co-exist in this world. I have no problem with religion and spiritual beliefs. I have my own. The problem with religion is not religion; the problem is how people use religion. We’ve always used it to justify many of the horrible things we do.

    I have sincere spiritual beliefs. However, I realize others may have different ones. I accept that, so we don’t have kill each over this. Live and let live. As long as my beliefs do not directly and adversely impact your life or your belief system mine, let’s agree to disagree, and live in peace and cooperate to make the world a better place for every human on the planet. I can make people aware of my beliefs as can you of yours, but I want to live in peace with you.  No need to fight about it. In the end, we all will see where our faith takes us. 

    So, I’m striving to continually improve as a person. As I live and gain experience, I keep learning and I am convinced goodness, kindness, empathy, spiritual development and more are necessary ingredients to have a more fulfilling and successful life. But, like everything in life, it takes effort.

    These are some of the reasons I chose to spend the amount of time I did with Judy. There is one other key factor. We profoundly connected in a way I had not really experienced before. In God and His universe, both of us found something very special in each other. My heart and my head totally agreed to take the path I was taking. It was intuitive and natural. I have never doubted my commitment to seeing Judy regularly like I do. Sure, there were some days I was very tired, but enough energy was always there when it came time to go and see Judy. I wouldn’t have it any other way.

  • Love You to the Moon and Back

    A Real Life Story by Glenn Hansen

    Dedicated to Sweet Judith, wherever you are in God’s universe.

    CHAPTER 12

    My dear friend Carol and another friend, Dawn, started to accompany me on my visits about once a week back in the hospital before the move to Riverview. Both Judy and I appreciated them coming to see her. It added a welcome dimension to the visits. For a few weeks we were able to take Judy to the main floor lounge area in the hospital via wheelchair with a portable oxygen tank and play Scrabble. It was once a week like we had done back at the apartment building when Judy first moved in. It was big fun and a nice distraction for Judy and me too.

    Unfortunately, we were only able to get four games in before Judy became too ill to play. Carol and Dawn still continued to come once a week with me and we had wonderful visits. I really appreciated their contribution and I know Judy enjoyed their visits with me immensely, and that was of paramount importance to me.

    At the same time it became obvious that Judy’s health was declining at an ever accelerating pace. All three of us wondered where all this was going. For myself, I was at a point of realization for the first time that Judy may not ever get better. Nevertheless, Judy was strong of heart, mind, faith and soul, and determined she was still going to get better. She was a fighter indeed. I still strongly supported her in this belief, but now realized there is a possibility that recovery may not happen. I admired her strength and hope. Through all of this she remained the warm and wonderful Judy I had come to know. And we both had strong faith and believed in possibilities, even if they started to diminish a little bit. God and His universe was a place of eternal hope and love. Who knows what is truly going to happen? In life you can always expect the unexpected, sometimes bad, but sometimes good.

    Over the course of my visits I met one of her sons and his wife and other family members. All of them were smart, engaging and quite friendly. However, when she received visitors like this, I would excuse myself pretty quickly and leave. Why? Because this was family and I did not in any way want to hinder their visits. As close as Judy and I now were, I was not family and I had previously decided to not stand in the way of family. I wanted them to be able to communicate with Judy freely as only family can. They would always insist I stay, but I would gracefully leave after a few minutes. This was their time.

    Judy continued to decline. I was all in to support her, whatever it took. One night back at the hospital, as I was about to leave, I witnessed a medical event that, to be honest, was scary to me, and of course, even more so to Judy. Her heart started racing. One hundred and twenty beats per minute, then one hundred and thirty, and finally all the way up to one hundred and forty-four. The hospital staff dealt with the situation calmly and with expedience. They gave her some medication, and after what seemed to be an eternity, the medication did its job and her heart rate came down.

    During this whole time, we held hands. For the first time ever, I thought, is this the end? Judy told me after things returned to normal, relatively speaking, the thought crossed her mind too. It was a horrible experience for her. This event occurred in her third month in the hospital. It did not bode well. I stayed with her for a good while after until we both believed that the medical event had passed and she was okay.

    I had remained calm and focused while all this was happening as I wanted to reassure Judy that everything was going to be okay, even though I was far from thinking that. Once I said goodnight and got outside to walk to my car, I took more than one deep breath. The crisp winter air tonight felt good for a change. I was able to fairly quickly discharge my adrenaline driven angst. Now, I was just tired and drove home. And yes, I was fine to drive. If I didn’t think I was up to it, I would have called a cab or taken a bus, although bus service would not be great at this time of night. A long walk was on the table too. Like later at Riverview Healthcare Centre, for the same reasons, I parked on a fairly nearby street and even though it was winter, I usually didn’t mind the walk. Besides, it was good for me. lol

  • Love You to the Moon and Back

    A Real Life Story by Glenn Hansen

    Dedicated to Sweet Judith, wherever you are in God’s universe.

    CHAPTER 11

     An interesting event occurred with regard to the piano player. One day, as I walked by his window, he glanced up and noticed me and nodded to affirm this recognition. I nodded back with a big smile. We continued to look at each other, and I raised my arms and used by fingers as if I was playing an “air” piano. Then I pointed to myself to indicate that I too played piano. His was excited by this and again nodded to me with a big smile. We had connected. We had an instant bonding moment.

    Music connects us all, in this case two musicians that played piano. It was a wonderful moment for both of us. This once again demonstrated the power of music in bringing people together regardless of where they lived, their culture or circumstance. If only this attribute of human behaviour could be carried across to the rest of human communication, endeavours and behaviours.

    I enthusiastically shared this encounter with Judy the next time I saw her. She happily responded to my story as if she felt this musical connection too. Judy is very much a thoughtful, naturally sensing person. She grasps any situation with tremendous intuition and insight.

    Driving home from this visit, I felt very satisfied with the day. Judy and I had a wonderful visit and I knew it really uplifted her and that’s the whole intent on my part; and she uplifted me more than she will ever know. Add to this the connection I made with the piano player in the window, and what more can one ask for? I have so much: food, shelter, good people in my life, enough monetary resources. I don’t want the world. I want a peaceful, non-toxic existence in God’s world. Everything else is superfluous. I’ve never wanted or needed that big house, fancy sports car or other big, so-called status symbols; possessions are not really so big, if you think about it. You do need good health. It’s the key to everything.

    Don’t get me wrong; I encourage people, myself included, to try and excel, make a decent living and seek worthy goals. There’s nothing wrong at all with trying to make money or run a profitable business. One of the problems though, is that from birth we get indoctrinated with how our lives should be. The same was true for my parents. We have to have “things” to find self-worth. It’s a big lie, but it sells products and services.

    The other big problem is when that line is crossed between need and greed. There’s making an honest buck; and making money, the more the better, at any cost. This is toxic human behaviour, along with the lust for power. It destroys people’s lives, causes wars, fuels hatred and engenders so many other undesirable elements in our world. The band War sang, “Why can’t we be friends?” It’s true. Eliminate this type of behaviour and what a much better place the world would be.

    I also stopped to gas up at a station along the route I took to and from the hospital. It often offered, by far, the lowest price on quality gasoline in the area. Today was no exception. Gas was at a great price. Nowadays, of course, when you purchase gasoline you usually have to pay up front, either with a credit or debit card right at the pump, or you go inside and pre-pay the amount you think will fill the vehicle. Like anything else, you get better at judging the amount you need through experience. As I gassed up, I could feel the warm spring sun and the fresh cleansing breeze. What a grand day. Even gassing up was an enjoyable undertaking.

    When I did get home and finished dinner, I worked on recording some new music. My place is just a bachelor suite, but I have enough room because I went with the twin size bed and not the queen size. You would always find my keyboard, guitars and other gear efficiently placed. I basically have five quadrants in my suite: my bed; my adjacent music workspace with a computer that I also use for graphic design and communication; a small living room with a loveseat, television, bookshelves and a small dining table; a small but full kitchen; and, of course, a bathroom with full bath. Encompassed by all of this is the surprisingly roomy hallway entrance. I really don’t need much more and cleaning is easy. Even if I came into a good sum of money, I doubt I would move. On the rare occasions when I have one or two people visit, there is sufficient space to seat us all without being on each other’s knee. lol

    Doing some recording after the great day I already had, was a wonderful way to celebrate. I don’t use sequencing, midi or other such types of gear, I play and record everything in real time. I enjoy the challenge of doing it this way. I have a terrific and versatile keyboard, good acoustic and electric guitars, guitar effects pedals, a nice studio microphone for vocals

    and all sorts of other peripherals. I use a DAW (Digital Audio Workstation) as the interface between the instruments and my computer. It’s how they “talk” to each other. Enough of this boring stuff. What it all enables me to do is create music, my main creative passion.

    Finally, around midnight I called it a day and turned on some soft music. As I lay in bed I reflected on this past wonderful day and felt so blessed. From there I went to oblivion confident I was going to see another day.

  • Love You to the Moon and Back

    A Real Life Story by Glenn Hansen

    Dedicated to Sweet Judith, wherever you are in God’s universe.

    CHAPTER 10

    The internet and Social Media used to be a positive, engaging entity. You could reconnect with friends and make new ones on Facebook. You could read what’s on the minds of people on Twitter (now X). You could enjoy the offerings on YouTube. Add to this Instagram, Tik Tok, Reddit and many others.

    Text messaging is a very useful tool. It was a way for Judy and I to communicate with each other without being intrusive at any time. In my overall daily life, texting is a wonderful tool. I don’t use it for things like, “I’m eating a salad right now” etc. I feel texting is intrusive when it’s an endless barrage of messages talking about what I or someone else was doing minute by minute. This is inane, and for me, irritating and a waste of time. I want to use it to convey what I felt was important and leave it at that. 

    Now though, some social media has descended into a toxic wasteland of lies and hate with an endless bombardment of deceptive advertising, often for dubious products and services. In particular I became very disenchanted with Facebook and Twitter (X). Facebook has unfortunately evolved from a great way to connect with people to a limitless stream of content chosen for you by algorithms. Now, unless they suggest a “Friend,” it’s actually difficult to find someone and connect. Meanwhile, Twitter (X), far from being the deliverer of truth on a global platform, has become so filled with lies, hate and propaganda, it has become deflating to engage on the platform much anymore. And again, algorithms rule the day.

    Yes, the internet and social media are worthwhile, but humanity’s involvement and behaviour has long since moved them to a darker place where greed, hate, power and corruption has slowly embedded themselves. While there are so many good people in the world, there are those who have illicit and inhumane agendas. This is no surprise. It’s why we have wars. When something good comes along, it can be used to improve our lives, or it can be used by some for monetization and nefarious purposes. This is my concern about burgeoning Artificial Intelligence (also referred to as AI). Great things could be accomplished with AI, but, not so great things will rise to the surface as well.

    Judy and I texted regularly. This was a vital connection in our two different worlds, mine being what was happening in the outside world, her’s being about what was happening inside her world at the Riverview Healthcare Centre. More importantly, it allowed me to easily communicate my personal thoughts about her to her at any time and likewise for her. This took many forms. Sometimes I would send her pictures of flowers or interesting subject matter and more, along with my warm words of caring to her. I always told her, in person and via text, that I was always thinking of her, and not to ever forget this. “Love you to the moon and back” had become an integral part of our communication and relationship.

    Back when she was in the hospital I started to gently kiss her on the forehead after asking her permission the first time. As time went on, our embraces became increasingly warm and caring. Then at the healthcare centre, when we hugged, she started kissing me on the cheek or neck. We’re not talking romance here kids. This was genuine friendship on a profound level.

    Believe it or not though, there were people who knew she was very ill, yet still thought something more might be going on. This was, of course, ludicrous. Among other things, I could hardly climb into the sophisticated bed with her that only accommodates one person. Then there’s the never ending stream of healthcare workers coming and going. But, people are people and can conjure up all sorts of ridiculousness. I realize it can be difficult for some to accept that a man and a woman can actually just be loving friends. This is why our culture’s media and celebrity obsession, accelerated now by social media, continues to increasingly spiral out of control in the race for sensationalism. More and more, truth is getting harder to find. It now takes much more discernment and effort.    

    I always wished her goodnight. Sometimes I would design a graphic to send her in the evening expressing this sentiment. We also developed an orange heart, red heart signature for each other. Such was the depth of our friendship. I knew that while she had an improved quality of life for now; thanks to her doctor, the nurses and the aides; this was only temporal. We made the most of this time.

    As time marched on, Judy increasingly wanted me to stay longer and longer. I understood this and did my best to be as accommodating as possible. It was getting more difficult to leave at the end of visits. I sometimes even felt a little guilty, although I knew I shouldn’t. I dedicated a lot of my life to her right now, and was glad to do so and grateful for being able to do it. But, I had to be careful not to overextend myself mentally, emotionally and physically. I was no longer a young man. This was a reality. While I am still reasonably healthy, I have some health issues that are potentially going to impact my life sooner than I would like.

    I also have a son, grandson, brothers and sisters, and their families, along with friends. It was important to me to not neglect them too much. On top of all this, there was the matter of just living life. Doing all the things you needed to keep moving forward on a day to day basis. Groceries, doctor appointments, paying bills, helping out others; these were necessities that had to be done. This is what makes a critical illness situation for the people surrounding someone who is critically ill so complex.

    The hardest part was trying to make some time for myself to unwind, blow off steam and, for me, create. This is a vital element of life we all sometimes neglect and it’s so important to do this and the things we enjoy doing. It allows us to carry on. 

  • Love You to the Moon and Back

    A Real Life Story by Glenn Hansen

    Dedicated to Sweet Judith, wherever you are in God’s universe.

    CHAPTER 9

    Throughout my coming and going to the centre, on numerous occasions I would see the man playing the piano in the window. On days when I did not see him, I could not help but think that maybe he was no longer here with us, given this was a critical illness facility. This saddened me. But, when I would see him on the next visit, I would feel relieved and good about that. His joy in playing had continued to have a positive impact on me. Who was this man of mystery anyway? I had to find out more some time.

    On one visit to see Judy, I told her about the man playing piano in the window while we were sitting indoors in the downstairs common room as it was cool outside and raining lightly. She insisted she wanted to see where he played. While not dressed for the weather, she wanted to see where now. I thought about it for a moment and then said, “Okay, let’s do it!” (I give a nod to Nike here). We both shared a big laugh and off outdoors we went.

    We laughed the whole time we were outside; “laughter in the rain” as Neil Sedaka sang a long time ago. It was a wonderfully juvenile thing to do. When we got to the window, the man was not playing, but now Judy knew where I was referring to. We made a hasty retreat back inside, laughing all the way.